Sunday, July 26, 2009

I Wanna Do Bad Thiiiings To You

How f-cking good is "True Blood?" I mean, I thought it might provide some cheap thrills after reading David Bianculli's (Daily News) initial review (he was right about all of the gratuitous nudity) before it premiered, but I NEVER thought I'd be hooked like I am. I haven't been on a show like this since "The Wire" (though I doubt I'll ever be that captivated again), and before that, "Six Feet Under." HBO just has that formula (as they constantly remind you during those "99 Emmy Nomination" ads). My favorite characters are probably Bill and Eric. I'm waitin' for them niggas to clash over Sookie, who is starting to become annoying in her earnestness.

Electrifying conclusion: F-ck happened to "Tell Me You Love Me?" That show had MASSIVE amounts of graphic sex. And the characters were interesting. I'd trade "Entourage" for it; their cuttin' on Seth Rogen over there, and they got Turtle gettin' mile high handjobs from f-cking Meadow Soprano? C'mon!

I'm all for the reinstatement of Pete Rose! I don't at all agree with the betting, but he should be in the Hall for having 4,000 (!) hits and having played in more games than anyone. Plus, he got bodyslammed by WWE's Kane - twice. Give that man a plaque!

Is Morgan Freeman really gonna marry his 27 year old step granddaughter? Word?

Vernon Forrest, world class boxer, the first to beat Sugar Shane Mosley, was murdered. According to the AP, Forrest, 38, was shot several times in the back Saturday night.

Electrifying conclusion: If you don't know about Vernon, you better ask. About his Destiny's Child foundation. About his work with the disabled. By all accounts, this was a really good dude. These athlete murders are getting outta control. I remember when he beat Sugar Shane. Back when Sugar Shane was what Floyd Mayweather is now. He achieved great late career success (I'm a big fan of that), and actually would have been a world champion at the time of his murder, if not for injuries which caused him to be stripped of the title. R.I.P.

I agree with Johnny Drama - grown men shouldn't buy other grown men birthday gifts.

Nas is ordered to pay Kelis 44 large every month for child support. The dope part is that he got this news right after the birth of his newborn. He also has to pay $45,000 to cover attorney and "gotcha nigga" fees.

Electrifying conclusion: Like everyone else, all I could think was, "Damn, Nas got paper like that? Of course he doesn't! And if he does, they made sure he won't anymore!" Sh-t, I must be missing something. He got hit up for not supporting her through pregnancy? What the hell?! He's in the wrong, but isn't the money for "child" support? "Child support," not "fetus support." $45,00 a month - because her albums brick? Is that it? Yo, that nigga better start releasing albums like No Limit did in the '90s from now on. Sheesh. Talk about cheaper to keep her.

Could Katie Holmes be the most overrated beauty in Hollywood? Maybe.
But were her tits fabulous in "The Gift?" Yes.
Was Selma Blair's sex scene in "Storytelling" as ridiculously arousing as it was racist? Absolutely.
Did that have anything to do with Katie Holmes? Of course not.