When you are one, you don't think about the term much until a kid tells you something real serious. After that, you stay aware and pray you don't hear about any more fucked up things happening to your students. As a matter of fact, you just pray that nothing fucked up happens to your students. I had a really rough one a coupla months back, with all types of abuse and violence, and I hoped to make it through these last 2 weeks without anything similar happening. What happened today doesn't seem like anything close to that situation, but who knows what'll be awaiting me on Monday morning?
So. My favorite participant (yeah I got favorites, and what?) in the attendance program I run at a Brooklyn High School came in with bruises. Her bruises were not at all consistent with her story of falling down stairs. I’m a mandated reporter, of course, so I told her that I have to report this to the proper authorities, since she didn’t want to tell me what happened to her. I kinda sensed that she wasn’t feeling this revelation as I watched her run through the hallways away from me and her Guidance Counselor. Gotta follow up now. She might never talk to me again. Which is ok since we are both leaving the school. But I do feel like a hypocrite, especially in light of some of my personal experiences, and decisions I’ve made. She expects me to keep all of her secrets. Some, I never would, but I can’t front, I’m very reluctant about leaving the fate of these Black/Hispanic families in the hands of “the system.” The system hasn’t been so good to me, so I don’t have much faith in it. But at the end of the day, I gotta convince myself that I did the right thing. No amount of support I get from people who explain to me why I shouldn’t feel bad can change how I feel…nah, that’s not true. Sometimes, people give me perspective I don’t have, and it makes me feel better. But right now, I feel like a villain. I don’t even wanna follow up, to tell you the truth. She said that I don’t know what kinda hell she’s about to be put through. I believe her. And I also believe that that hell could be bad enough to make a kid keep abuse to herself. I mean, why should she believe that she can be helped? She’s never seen what help looks like, only hurt. She probably doesn’t even believe help exists. In that case, she chooses the lesser of the hurts. And then I come and tell her that she doesn’t really have a choice.
1 comment:
Good post -- man what a tough predicament. I would say you have to report it, being mandated and all...if the bruises lead to something worst than they may come after you...all that being said I see your point especially with the lack of credibility surrounding New York City's Administration for Children's Services (ACS).
Ya'll remember the story of Nixzmary Brown? In short, she was abused, treated like an animal, and eventually murdered by her bitch of a stepfather and non-uterus worthy mother...
--There was evidence of previous abuse done to Brown, and this murder case later focused attention on The ACS, who had received two complaints about the family; the first complaint in 2004 proved unsubstantiated. The second complaint came on December 1, 2004 when Brown showed up at school with a black eye...
However, ACS was quick to do nothing about this--a failed state institution whose employees try to slog out a 9-5 then hurry home drink themselves out of the all to real, reality they have experienced throughout the day--granted there probably are a select few that do care--however these people become a victim of the red tape and buracreacy that plague these Fed and State programs...programs that are instituted with a grand initial idea to better service the community and country but are as internally flawed as they are corrupt--Solution, to be honest I don't really have one other...maybe apoint someone that could spark a flame under the asses of these employees--maybe a dude like General Russel L. Honoré--you know the "John Wayne dude" of Katrina, who came in way to late, but was the only one to get some supplies and order back to NOLA--im just saying...sorry to flood your post starpower, just had to sound off-- continue to keep it real and electric on the blog...
~young einstein
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